I Feel Like The Biggest Bitch

When I woke in the middle of the night I wasn’t at all surprised to see Spencer lying next to me sound asleep. Most people would consider this weird, to be sharing a bed with your ex-boyfriend but me, well actually yes I do find it weird as well, although considering what happened between us I feel oddly safe with Spencer around.

I quietly snuck out of the bedroom and headed towards the kitchen in hopes of finding some food since I had slept through dinner, I was thrilled to find some of my favourite pizza in the fridge.

If I was being honest, I know I rely too heavily on Spencer considering we aren’t dating anymore but it’s hard to change your ways, even harder knowing it was out of control as to why we had the distance put between us.

Him admitting that he still loved me made me realise that nothing had changed for him and I knew I had to work out how I felt, I also knew that having him constantly around like this isn’t going to be good for him while I’m working it out.

A noise startled me and I jumped around ignoring the pain.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Spencer mumbled in the middle of a yawn but I just frowned at him before turning back to my laptop.

“What are you doing awake?” I questioned when he sat down beside me on the couch realising he wasn’t going back to sleep.

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“Yes well I’ve been asleep for a lot longer then you.”

“That is also true, why are you looking at apartments?” I looked over at him, if it was anyone else I probably would have hidden my laptop but then he would have known I was hiding something from him.

“I can’t stay here anymore, too many memories, Nathan knows I live here. I just want a fresh start somewhere, I don’t even want my old apartment anymore.”

“Too many memories huh?” I looked over at Spencer and I hated that he was a little hurt.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that, it’s just everything as a whole, good and bad. You can’t tell me you exactly want to keep living here knowing I had a boyfriend in here?”

I knew Spencer would have had to have an issue staying here knowing I had to have been here at one point with Damon, hell I was pretty sure Spencer knew I had Damon in the Hamptons but that was a different conversation for a different day.

“Did you love him?” Spencer’s question completely shocked me but out of all this that was the one thing I knew for sure.

“No and I don’t even know if I believe him when he said he loved me.”

“Do you believe me when I say I love you?” I nodded while turning my attention back to the laptop, it was easier then looking at his face.

“Will I ever get another chance?” I didn’t know how to answer that.

“Are you moving back home?”

“I am, does that change anything?” I nodded at him because honestly it does, him moving back here will give us the chance to fix what was broken. “Okay, I’m going back to bed. Please don’t stay up all night.”

The only thing I knew for sure was that I was feeling safer having Spencer around, I knew that if he left I would be devastated but would he stick around long enough for me to work out what I still felt for him?

I spent a little bit longer searching for apartments marking the ones I wanted to check out when I was better before going back to bed and curling up beside Spencer.

Him wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me close made me feel happy to have him back, I forgot how much I enjoyed these moments with him.

Thinking he was asleep, I let out a sigh of relief. “I’m glad you’re back Spence.”

“Me too Dri,” he replied sounding incredibly sleepy and for once all day, his response to something like this wasn’t awkward and I took it as a good sign.

Surprise Visits

I was finally released from the hospital this morning and I’ve spent all day on the couch binge watching T.V.

The doctors explained that I had a broken rib and three cracked ribs explaining most of the pain I was in whenever I moved as well as substantial bruising coving most of my body, I was also admitted with a concussion and the doctors believed that may be the reasoning behind me not being able to remember what happened with Nathan.

The police had tried questioning me about the attack but all I could say was I didn’t remember what happened so all they had to go off was what Spencer witnessed and the fact that Nathan had bruising on his knuckles.

Spencer hadn’t made any mention to what I told him about Nathan, I don’t know if it’s because Spencer didn’t want to talk about it again or if he was waiting till I was fully healed and ready to talk.

“Really, that’s what you’ve spent all day watching?” I heard Spencer’s voice and waited till he had come round from behind the couch so I could look at him.

We haven’t spoken about his meeting with his bosses the other day but he’s been going into work every day this week for some reason or another, I was too scared to ask because I didn’t want to know if it meant he was leaving. In fact I hated being here alone all day.

“You’re back!” I exclaimed a little too loudly and he raised an eyebrow at me.

“Are you alright Dri?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. You know nothing wrong with being left alone all day after I’ve been released from the hospital after being attacked,” I spat back a little too sarcastically and his face fell obviously not realising what my issue was.

“Crap, Dri I’m really sorry. I honestly didn’t realise, I don’t have to go back in for a couple of days, I promise I won’t be leaving you alone anymore.” I nodded at him before he kissed the top of my head and disappeared down the hallway.

I jumped at the sound of someone knocking on the door, I stayed where I was on the couch and it wasn’t long until I heard Spencer walking down the hallway heading for the front door.

I could only just hear the voices from the door but I wasn’t able to make anything out, I figured if it was one of our friends they would have come straight in and come see me on the couch. The fact that Spencer wasn’t letting them in wasn’t a good sign.

I struggled to get off the couch but managed it and headed towards the hallway so I could see who was at the door.

“Dri!” I stopped at the sight of Damon standing there.

I honestly didn’t believe he would turn up at the apartment, now of all times. Spencer had no idea who he was but must have suspected this was the so called boyfriend.

“Please hear me out babe” I shook my head at Damon. I didn’t want to deal with this, I just wanted him out of my life.

“There, just like I told you she doesn’t want to talk to you.”

“Oh whatever mate, you haven’t even been here.”

“You’re right I haven’t and I hate that but I’m the one that is now and more importantly I’m the one she wants here not you.”

I stood there and watched as Spencer and Damon had a standoff, I always knew Spencer was protective over me but I didn’t understand why Damon was trying so hard.

Damon had manage to push past Spencer and head my way, I didn’t know what to expect. If he was friends with Nathan was there a chance I would end up back in hospital?

“Dri please listen to me, I stopped giving Nathan information on you. I couldn’t do it anymore, I fell in love with you Dri.” That snapped me out of it, being told he loved was enough to realise it was more lies.

“You fell in love me? If you loved me you would have told me the truth not hide everything from me, I was up front with you. I told you about Spencer.”

“But you didn’t tell me about your history with Nathan.”

I couldn’t believe he was using that as an excuse for keeping things from me, I ignored the pain down my side as I raised my hand and slapped him hard across the face.

“We are done Damon! I don’t care what you have to say, our relationship was a lie from the start so excuse me if I don’t want to give you a chance to explain.” I was seething, I couldn’t believe he was trying to convince me to take him back.

“I think it’s time you left,” Spencer spoke sternly while appearing behind Damon and I was grateful, my ribs were killing me, I need more pain killers and a nap.

“Leave Damon…” I turned to leave and couldn’t help it when I hissed in pain at Damon grabbing my wrist and pulling me towards him.

“You need to leave now before you cause any more pain,” I could tell Spencer was angry and noticing the grip he had the same wrist gripping my own was evidence enough but he was still controlling himself.

Damon stood there for a moment before letting go of my wrist and in turn Spencer let go of his, the two of them stood there glaring at each other for a moment before Damon eventually took in Spencer’s threat and left us alone.

As soon as the door was shut Spencer turned and faced me, I was glad to see the anger had disappeared and he was full of concern.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I just need some more pain killers,” I spoke as I headed towards the kitchen to grab my pills and head back to the bedroom to get some sleep.